The world was still scary. Everything was terrifying in its own aspects. But after spending day, if not more, with no food and only access to the dripple that ran down into the abandoned burrow she was left with a growling stomach. That she was aware would need sustenance sooner rather than later, encouraged the small molly to slowly begin venturing outside of the den, just leaving it for a moment before going back in struggling with the bright light that hit her eyes every time she stayed in the outside for too long.

It was hell. Or well, as much as hell could be, having experienced something similar to it before. Just before rather. Nevertheless, it was a slow progress of the brightness slowly disappearing from her vision, slowly going away, and leaving her back in the darkness that she’d so longed for. It would be strange for some, that comfort was not found in the bright and open world, but rather in the dark corners where nothing was visible. But it was her every day… every life. Darkness was all she’d ever known, and therefore… it was the feeling of comfort she embraced. Whereas others may feel happy from the singing of birds… for Doepaw it was the complete darkness, it was the darkest part of her mind, the obsidian nothingness that was what she felt the most comfortable in, felt secure and safe in. Everyone had their own perspective of what made them safe, and this was hers.

And that was why it took so long to finally move out of the burrow, at that point even thinner than the already thin apprentice had been. The sun had set, and darkness had enveloped the area, for now. And she was going to make the best out of it. So, small steps lead the blind cat out of the den on shaky legs. It felt like it had been forever since she’d been capable of moving just a few fox lengths and here she was, starving, ribs visible beneath the grey fur and the bones standing out starkly in the oblivion.

Moving unsteadily out into the dark forest she just absorbed the sounds, absorbed everything as she started to regain her senses fully despite the rumbling of her stomach. What could she even catch? She’d never really learned anything from Talonfeather… or whatever her mentor’s name had been, and this seemed to be to her detriment as she was stuck here with no experience. No knowledge of how to fend for herself, hunt, or the straight basics. She knew how to smell, how to get around and the rough basics of fighting, but nothing that would help with her survival on her own.

It wasn’t a thought that had occurred to her that one day she would without the support of her clan, that one day she would be alone and supposed to hunt and defend herself against anyone and everything. It was all new, and everything new terrified her. That was in part too, as to why she stayed within the confines of the darkness. Why she stayed where the sun didn’t shine. Such a strange thing to come from a Thunderclan cat, such words should rather have been reserved for a cat of the shadows but nevertheless, nothing could change how she was feeling and how she’d felt her entire life.

There was a constant, drip drop, the soft pad of rain across the forest floor as she walked across the darkness. Now to find food. Food. It seemed as she just begun to think of that word her entire world went into overdrive and she was solely focused on getting one thing, and that one thing was food. Food. It dominated her mind, took over and broke down every rational wall that had been put up after her break shortly past her parent’s death. Which was still so very raw she preferred not to think about it at all but was unable to ignore it. But… wait, she heard something. Ears perking the molly stopped straight in her tracks as she looked around with her empty eyes. Due to the lack of moon, and thereby the lack of any lighting, she knew she had an advantage over any prey but the issue was catching it and not the advantage itself. So at the sound of scattering steps she slid into a half awkward crouch that didn’t resemble anything that apprentice’s would normally have been taught. Launching herself through the air she missed and her meal went away in the shadows.

That had been the main expense of her energy that had gone into the hunt of that little piece of prey and it was with a sigh of defeat she collapsed on the ground. Just water. That was all she had access to, no food and it seemed it would be her destiny just to survive as long as she could on it. She lacked the energy to do much else, to move back to the burrow and to get anywhere. Hunger it seemed, would be what would take her down. Not the thunderpath, not Sagefeather, not a hawk like Dovekit but rather such a basic need as lack of food.

No. She couldn’t succumb to this. She couldn’t let this win and despite the feeling of brokenness within herself, Doepaw dragged herself up to her paws once again. She would be the winner of this, despite the tiredness in her bones, despite the brokenness of her mind, despite the shaking body. She would survive this. And decided to head back to her den, this time determination shining through her instead of hopelessness, she stood up, legs shaky but with a will of iron. She could do this. It was possible to get through this despite what would be said.

And it was on this way back to her den, to the burrow, whatever it was, that she heard the steps of yet another small creature. This time, she let instinct take over and it wasn’t long before she had her first prey in her jaws, and then soon in her belly. It had been a shrew. Her first catch. And with the poor rodent now warming her belly, she found the energy to return to her nest and curl up. This time she went to sleep, not afraid of the future but waiting to see what the next day would bring. Hope had started blooming within her.